President Barack Obama puts out a list of his favorite books each and every year. Did you know, however, that every other US president has also shared their favorite books with the American public? Well, that’s not true, but we’re here today to imagine what it’d be like. Here is an original funny list by Better Book Titles contributors exploring the subject!
Below are a few books each American president would have loved if they lived long enough to read them.
Enjoy!
If Other US Presidents Besides Barack Obama Shared A List Of Their Favorite Books:
by Dan Wilbur, Jay Welch, and Jake Currie
George Washington
Zadie Smith’s White Teeth: America’s first president aspired to have them.
Later, after he was president for a while his favorite book was Quiet: The Power of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking
His review of both: “…”
John Adams
The second president loved Mr. Grumpy and John A. Farrell’s Attorney For The Damned
Thomas Jefferson
By all accounts, this man was a little full of himself. His favorite book was Thomas Jefferson: The Art Of Power “What a read! I killed it!”
Other books on his list include: Black Beauty and How Stella Got Her Groove Back
His review: “Damn! She sounds sexy!!”
James Madison
He loved Stuart Little, Little Men, The Hobbit, Measure for Measure, The Big Short
OK, we get it.
James Monroe
100 years of Solitude – his favorite book and doctrine!
Andrew Jackson
Larry McMurtry’s Comanche Moon
His review: “If I were in charge of the Texas Rangers, we’d have caught that horse thief!!”
William Henry Harrison
As I Lay Dying 🙁
Also, he loved the Carhartt Winter Coat Catalog
His review: “Fuck, it’s cold!!”
James K. Polk
His review: “We’re going to California whether it’s a good idea or not!”
Also on his list: The Westing Game, Finders Keepers, and Continental Drift
Zachary Taylor
Love In The Time Of Cholera 🙁
James Buchanan
Gone With The Wind
Sure, slavery is reprehensible, but not if you sort of ignore it.
Abraham Lincoln
Frankenstein and Twilight
Though he loved the plays of Shakespeare most (in fact, he loved plays to a fault), America’s most goth president loved horror.
Andrew Johnson
Vaught’s Practical Character Reader: A Beginner’s Guide to Phrenological Madness
The president who ended Reconstruction loved to have scientific backing for his heinous opinions.
He also loved Hillbilly Elegy. Ugh.
Ulysses S. Grant
Drinking: A Love Story
His review: “*Buurp*”
Teddy Roosevelt
Into The Wild
His review: “I coulda done it without dying.”
Also on his list: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Howard Taft
Guy Fieri Food: Cookin’ It, Lovin’ It, Livin’ It
To be read from his famously massive bathtub. Other titles on his list of favorites: The Omnivore’s Dilemma, A Moveable Feast, Green Eggs and Ham
Woodrow Wilson
Why Do Women Nag? And How To Quit Nagging For Good
His review: “Fine, give them whatever they want! Just tell them to leave me alone already!”
His wife insists he also loved Can You Forgive Her?
Warren G. Harding
John Updike’s Rabbit novels
“Sure, I had a secret love child and ruined her mother’s life, but at least I’m not as bad as this guy.”
Herbert Hoover
Hillbilly Elegy
His review: “You see?! The poor did it to themselves! They need to be less poor without government help!”
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Master And Commander
His review: “Hell yeah! I love boats almost as much as I love pussy!”
Another favorite: The Swimmer
Harry S. Truman
Decisive: How To Make Better Choices in Life and Work
His review: “I rest my case.”
Dwight D. Eisenhower
Chomsky’s Hegemony or Survival: America’s Quest for Global Dominance
I’m not saying Chomsky liked him, I’m saying Eisenhower tried to tell us to calm down with the weapons, and Chomsky agreed.
John F. Kennedy
John Updike’s Rabbit novels
“This guy seems all right.”
Lyndon B. Johnson
Killing Kennedy
“Kidding!!”
He also loved The 48 Laws of Power
Richard Nixon
The Bible
“It’s what you beatniks need.”
Also on his list: In Search of Lost Time (about the 18 and a half minute gap).
Gerald Ford
Chaucer’s The Pardoner’s Tale
Jimmy Carter
The Fatigue Solution: Increase Your Energy In Eight Easy Steps
Maybe if he’d said the Malaise Speech a little faster not everyone would have hated it.
He also loves Mr. Peanut, Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House, and, of course, Matthew 5:27
Ronald Reagan
Atlas Shrugged
Obviously. He also loved the second half of Flowers For Algernon and The Sun Down Motel
George HW Bush, Sr.
Diary Of A Wimpy Kid
Also: The 9/11 Commission Report
He mostly loved it as a joke after reading the truth in his CIA briefings.
Bill Clinton
Devil In A Blue Dress
Also, 50 Shades of Gray and I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, The Scarlet Letter
George W. Bush
Where’s Waldo
Not the biggest reader per se.
His review: “By 2007, I sorta gave up on finding him.”
Donald Trump
The 4-Hour Workweek
Additional titles: The Art of The Deal (he literally said this)
Joe Biden
Train Dreams, The Polar Express, Thomas The Tank Engine (note–he didn’t like Strangers On A Train because people on a train should be friends)
Also: Clifford The Big Red Dog
“Come on, man. That’s all anyone wants. Look at him. That big fucking dog. I love him.”
See more funny bookish posts on Better Book Titles:
Here Are The Best Books People Read In 2021
25 Funny Pulitzer-Worthy Tweets From This Week
Who Says Learning Can’t Be Funny? (28 Textbook Jokes)
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