President Barack Obama puts out a list of his favorite books each and every year. Did you know, however, that every other US president has also shared their favorite books with the American public? Well, that’s not true, but we’re here today to imagine what it’d be like. Here is an original funny list by Better Book Titles contributors exploring the subject!
Below are a few books each American president would have loved if they lived long enough to read them.
If Other US Presidents Besides Barack Obama Shared A List Of Their Favorite Books:
Zadie Smith’s White Teeth: America’s first president aspired to have them.
Later, after he was president for a while his favorite book was Quiet: The Power of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking
His review of both: “…”
The second president loved Mr. Grumpy and John A. Farrell’s Attorney For The Damned
By all accounts, this man was a little full of himself. His favorite book was Thomas Jefferson: The Art Of Power “What a read! I killed it!”
Other books on his list include: Black Beauty and How Stella Got Her Groove Back
His review: “Damn! She sounds sexy!!”
He loved Stuart Little, Little Men, The Hobbit, Measure for Measure, The Big Short
OK, we get it.
100 years of Solitude – his favorite book and doctrine!
Larry McMurtry’s Comanche Moon
His review: “If I were in charge of the Texas Rangers, we’d have caught that horse thief!!”
William Henry Harrison
As I Lay Dying 🙁
Also, he loved the Carhartt Winter Coat Catalog
His review: “Fuck, it’s cold!!”
James K. Polk
His review: “We’re going to California whether it’s a good idea or not!”
Also on his list: The Westing Game, Finders Keepers, and Continental Drift
Love In The Time Of Cholera 🙁
Gone With The Wind
Sure, slavery is reprehensible, but not if you sort of ignore it.
Frankenstein and Twilight
Though he loved the plays of Shakespeare most (in fact, he loved plays to a fault), America’s most goth president loved horror.
Vaught’s Practical Character Reader: A Beginner’s Guide to Phrenological Madness
The president who ended Reconstruction loved to have scientific backing for his heinous opinions.
He also loved Hillbilly Elegy. Ugh.
Ulysses S. Grant
Drinking: A Love Story
His review: “*Buurp*”
Into The Wild
His review: “I coulda done it without dying.”
Also on his list: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Guy Fieri Food: Cookin’ It, Lovin’ It, Livin’ It
To be read from his famously massive bathtub. Other titles on his list of favorites: The Omnivore’s Dilemma, A Moveable Feast, Green Eggs and Ham
Why Do Women Nag? And How To Quit Nagging For Good
His review: “Fine, give them whatever they want! Just tell them to leave me alone already!”
His wife insists he also loved Can You Forgive Her?
Warren G. Harding
John Updike’s Rabbit novels
“Sure, I had a secret love child and ruined her mother’s life, but at least I’m not as bad as this guy.”
His review: “You see?! The poor did it to themselves! They need to be less poor without government help!”
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Master And Commander
His review: “Hell yeah! I love boats almost as much as I love pussy!”
Another favorite: The Swimmer
Harry S. Truman
Decisive: How To Make Better Choices in Life and Work
His review: “I rest my case.”
Dwight D. Eisenhower
Chomsky’s Hegemony or Survival: America’s Quest for Global Dominance
I’m not saying Chomsky liked him, I’m saying Eisenhower tried to tell us to calm down with the weapons, and Chomsky agreed.
John F. Kennedy
John Updike’s Rabbit novels
“This guy seems all right.”
Lyndon B. Johnson
He also loved The 48 Laws of Power
“It’s what you beatniks need.”
Also on his list: In Search of Lost Time (about the 18 and a half minute gap).
Chaucer’s The Pardoner’s Tale
The Fatigue Solution: Increase Your Energy In Eight Easy Steps
Maybe if he’d said the Malaise Speech a little faster not everyone would have hated it.
He also loves Mr. Peanut, Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House, and, of course, Matthew 5:27
Obviously. He also loved the second half of Flowers For Algernon and The Sun Down Motel
George HW Bush, Sr.
Diary Of A Wimpy Kid
Also: The 9/11 Commission Report
He mostly loved it as a joke after reading the truth in his CIA briefings.
Devil In A Blue Dress
Also, 50 Shades of Gray and I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, The Scarlet Letter
George W. Bush
Not the biggest reader per se.
His review: “By 2007, I sorta gave up on finding him.”
The 4-Hour Workweek
Additional titles: The Art of The Deal (he literally said this)
Train Dreams, The Polar Express, Thomas The Tank Engine (note–he didn’t like Strangers On A Train because people on a train should be friends)
Also: Clifford The Big Red Dog
“Come on, man. That’s all anyone wants. Look at him. That big fucking dog. I love him.”
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