If you can conjure a line from a book in your head, and instantly give yourself goosebumps, this may not be the post for you. However, if you love adding the “f-word” to famous lines in literature to make them funnier, welcome.
I’m not saying it’s true of all books everywhere, but sometimes a book drags. Especially old ones.
That’s why heroes like Twitter user @Turning_Pages7 come to us in our time of need and ask all of Twitter to share what prose could be spiced up with a fuck or two.
The results of this Twitter experiment were hilarious. Enjoy.
Here’s what happens when you ask Twitter to add the “F-word” to famous lines in literature:
“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the fucking past.” https://t.co/yzkV6qSfcD
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) January 26, 2022
"SOME FUCKING PIG" https://t.co/bHVMhX84pd
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) January 26, 2022
“And God said, Let there be light: and there was fucking light.” https://t.co/yt4uNepjsP
— RM (@dorsalstream) January 26, 2022
It was a queer, sultry summer, the summer they executed the Rosenbergs, and I didn't know what the fuck I was doing in New York. https://t.co/sc90y4NX9B
— Better Book Titles (@betterbooktitle) January 27, 2022
“Fuck me, Ishmael” https://t.co/RX0vzsDKte
— HEAD ASS JESIE (@jejesjesijessi) January 26, 2022
battle not with fucks, lest ye become a fuck https://t.co/uJW8nYJX70
— Friedrice Nietzsche (@tinynietzsche) January 26, 2022
Yea, noise? Then I’ll be brief. O happy dagger,
This is thy sheath. There rust and let me die.
(stabs herself with ROMEO’s dagger)
— Denny (@MechaDenny) January 27, 2022
“It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where the fuck you might be swept off to.” – Bilbo Baggins https://t.co/F37uhXurhX
— Oisín McGann (@OisinMcGann) January 25, 2022
"What fucking ho, Jeeves?" https://t.co/AH2NwyX781
— Count Mysterioso (@MysteriosoX) January 25, 2022
For how FUCKING long, Catilina, do you intend to abuse our patience? https://t.co/eaxporX34I
— vhv (@toutovlepo) January 25, 2022
Ah Bartleby! Fuck humanity! https://t.co/CM7tA1QMZb
— Jonathan just one before I die (@jsench) January 26, 2022
'Kill all the bluejays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a fucking mockingbird.' https://t.co/iPm2eNmj1h
— Donna McAdams (@thehicklife) January 26, 2022
Tell me, Muse, about a fucked up man. https://t.co/3ie9dzPOOX
— Dr. Jeremy Swist🤘🏛️🐈 (@MetalClassicist) January 25, 2022
As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transfomed in his bed into a gigantic fucking insect.
— Kevin Hague (@kevverage) January 25, 2022
— Emily Rowe- Grief Coach, Dragon Mother, Hat Maker (@EmilyRowe69) January 27, 2022
For me it's:
"What, you f*cking egg?"
[He stabs him]
— Chris (@Turning_Pages7) January 25, 2022